Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Randomize
