maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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