Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
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