they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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