Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize
