Banned from zoo.
Again?
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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