I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
