Your tits are I can't wait for
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
