My pussy is not your playground.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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