I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
