you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
