So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize