Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
