I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
