i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
