oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Randomize
