this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Randomize
