u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
You've changed since you got that strap on
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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