so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Randomize
