Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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