I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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