if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
