Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
