I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
