Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
