I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
