things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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