I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
