is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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