There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
