i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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