Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Randomize