Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
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