i would punch a child for taco bell
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Randomize
