is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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