Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
she smelled like a LAN party
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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