she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
