I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
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