do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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