i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
