I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
