Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Randomize
