Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
