I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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