no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
