Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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