The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
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