take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Randomize