i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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