One girl and one boy is just not enough.
North Korea, Best Korea!
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize
