We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
