he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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